Why perpetuate the lie?
We are all happy with our past companies, our past managers, and never argue with people. We always try to find a common ground while making concessions, and the people we interact and discuss with are never wrong. Oh, and the sun sets in the east (as true as the previous statements).
The experts' advice
Recruitment advice is consistent. No matter the recruiter or consultant you ask or listen to, many things are considered a universal truth. Such as :
- always adjust your CV for the specific job you are applying
- your LinkedIn profile is extremely important - you can pay to have it "fixed"
- never badmouth your last company or manager
- always be accomodating to your peers, subordinates and managers
I will not comment on the (obviously contradictory) first two statements. But I am really tired of the last two.
Why do people leave jobs?
Social media is great at providing us with memes and inspiring (or not) wisdom quotes. One of them is:
People leave managers, not companies.
First of all: Yes, but not exactly like that. Unless your manager is the CEO, your manager's actions and inactions are influenced by the company's current affairs. Do you want a promotion but you don't get promoted? One reason may be that your manager does not appreciate you, but another one may be, there are no opportunities in the company. No place for you to be promoted. Is it your manager's fault? Second: If people leave their managers, how are we all expected to consider a career ending fault, if someone states that in an interview? Why are we all expected to be very happy and grateful about our jobs and our managers, yet be eager to get the heck out of there as soon as possible (i.e.: the reason you are interviewing right now).
The idea behind that, is of course, that if you say anything negative about your past company, you are considered negative and difficult to handle. Well, I simply do not agree with that statement. Managers, starting from CEOs and going all the way down to line managers and team leads, are getting fired all the time. That means at some point, someone figured out they were not doing their job correctly or efficiently. If you worked for such a manager, is it really so bad to challenge them? Is it a red flag if you realized, earlier than the rest of the company, that they were not doing their job right?
At the same time, people are getting promoted for many different reasons, one of them (the most prevalent one) being that they are well networked and likable. It does not mean that they are efficient, or "right most of the time".
When did we stop value individuality and critical thinking?
How do you manage conflict?
Tell me about a time you had to deal with a colleague with conflicting priorities, and how you handled it. Typical question, the right answer to which is the STAR method, where you highlight your concessions to make things happen. Not surprising, the advice here is, to put it in very blunt terms, "tell us how you were right but you let that go to achieve a goal". And of course, this is an exceptionally valuable skill.
But do you know what is equally valuable? Knowing that you are right, for the particular company in the particular time, and fighting to make this happen. Also, equally valuable, to know that not all people need to be accomodated. Some are just difficult to work with - by the way, not YOU, in that case, but somebody else. And making concessions to an entitled brat does not help the organization achieve its objectives; but surprisingly, you are not allowed to say that. Because, apparently, you need to accept that everybody else except you is right and entitled.
Do we all have the same illusion?
Why do we perpetuate this illusion and lie? If "don't say anything bad" is well known and understood, and we all know it is a lie, how do we get value and insights on the people we want to hire, if we perpetuate and encourage this lie?
When I interview people, I always ask them why they are leaving their current job, and about difficult work relations. I consider their answers and try to figure out if they are rehearsed or not. For me, critical thinking, constructive feedback and challenge, thinking outside the box and not submitting to groupthink are exceptional qualities. And that is what I look for, when I hire for analysts, architects and engineers.
No, I do not want to work with difficult people. But I do not work to work with sheep and liers either, because mediocrity is so contagious!
Do not let my views influence you, except...
My personal views on the subject should not carry any value. The advice from the recruiters is more valuable if you are currently interviewing. Corporate world is comfortable with that lie, and if you want to work in corporations, the best you can do is keep living that lie.
Except, if I'm interviewing you. In that case, do not lie to me. Give me the uncomfortable truth, let me identify if you are right or wrong (and yes, you have to accept that you will not always be right). And if I like your answers, and you like my approach, we are going to have great time together!